5.w.
Professor
Inflation lobbed something toward Corporate Man and then ducked behind a column. There were columns everywhere. The entire floor was one gigantic space with
hundreds of floor-to-ceiling columns throughout. Long fluorescent bulbs, placed like grid
work, illuminated the space with a sickly glow.
“Price Bomb!”
yelled Corporate Man as he leapt aside.
The object
struck the ground with a metallic clunk, fastened to the floor like a magnet,
and exploded soundlessly, sucking all the noise from the air.
Senior
Executive held up his portfolio, shielding the Union
from the Devalue-Void created by the blast.
Wind whipped around him, threatening to drag him forward into the
financial sink but he held his ground and the Price Bomb fizzled out.
“Welcome to my
lair,” Professor Inflation said from somewhere.
His voice echoed throughout the open space disembodied and
threatening. “And to your economic
ruin.”
The professor
dashed out from behind a pillar, reached up, slapped two silver discs on
Supply’s knees, and dashed back behind another column. From the discs came a high pitched breet and
a flashing blue light. Then sound, like
a bug zapper, crackled as a high voltage charge buckled Supply’s legs and
brought the towering woman to the floor.
She moaned and
writhed.
Business Woman
rushed forward to assist as Corporate Man tried to gather his team together
amidst the confusion. But it was too
late. Professor Inflation was out of the
shadows again, attacking. He grabbed
Franklin Buck, pinning the newest member of the Union ’s
arm behind his back and jabbing a large needle under his chin, up into his
jaw.
“We are not having
a stand off,” Professor Inflation said, pulling Franklin Buck in tight like a
human shield. “I will suck the value
from this man with my liquidating needle.
I merely pause for dramatic effect and to tell you that I have a
plethora of wonderful implements with which I will dismantle all of you. As for this gentleman–”
But Professor
Inflation didn’t finish. His hand
remained motionless on the plunger of the hypodermic needle as a diamond card
pressed against his Adam’s apple.
Fair Wage rose
up behind the Professor and said, “I’m immune to your tricks Inflation.”
Professor
Inflation smiled, “ That may be, but I doubt your friends can claim protection
against… RISING COSTS.”
There was a
shudder throughout the floor and a pneumatic hiss steamed from all the columns
in the room. Then the floor moved,
rising slowly towards the ceiling.
“And so the
financial pinch will crush you all,” Professor Inflation intoned, gesturing in triumph
with his velvety gloved hands.
Fair Wage
snorted dismissively. “That old
bit. Won’t work Professor. You’ll have to come up with something better
than that.”
Professor
Inflation’s smile widened. Then he
feigned a look of puzzlement and said, “Oh dear me! You wouldn’t, perchance, mean something like…
this?”
He clapped
twice with pink gloved hands and the lights went out. A surge of panic coursed through the
dark. The Union Members called out to
each other but everyone was speaking at the same time.
“I’ve lost
him,” shouted Fair Wage.
“Quiet
everyone! Center on my voice,” said Corporate
Man.
“Recovering.”
“Can she hold
the crush of this fiscal death trap?”
“I’m trying,”
said Supply, “but the force is too great.”
“Where’s
Inflation?” said Senior Executive.
“If I’m north
and you’re south, he’s to the west of us,” said Corporate Man, holding the
greed gun in his hand.
“Interesting,”
came Professor Inflation’s voice. “I’m
not quite sure how you did that. Doesn’t
matter. Useless. I had no intention of killing you in the dark
anyway.”
A bright light
strobed, leaving freeze-frame images of the Union members imprinted on the
successive blackness. In the flickering
of images the caped form of Professor Inflation rushed in from the concealment
of the columns and surrounding dark. The
attack came in the space of three strobes.
On the first flash he was on the periphery. On the second he was in amongst them. The third flash revealed the decommissioning
punch, or chop, or kick.
By the fourth
strobe, he was gone.
One by one the
Union members fell to Inflation. Fair
Wage was not taken directly, but toppled under the limp form of Senior
Executive after the Professor had hurled him toward the old man in the ragged
brown suit.
Corporate Man
used the Greed-Gun to locate Professor Inflation’s position. He turned to face his flamboyant attacker,
dodged the first punch and swung a retaliatory blow, but when the light flashed
on, his fist swept through empty space. Inflation
had Corporate Man in a submission hold before the light went out again.
“Down with the
Union . Down with
Corporate Man,” said Professor Inflation.
He jabbed a knuckle into Corporate Man’s temple. Corporate Man crumpled to the floor.
Professor
Inflation chuckled, low and maniacal, then said, “And now all that’s left is
you… Dollar Man.
