Corporate Man is called in to investigate reports of vile, unethical business practices at Great American Business Company. What he finds there just might destroy him (except we all know the ending to The Tragic Death of Corporate Man so it should be fairly obvious that it can't really destroy him, though it can come close).
Enslaved by the Bonus Whores is an all new Corporate Man Adventure Serial. Chapters will post every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.
Monday, April 29, 2013
The Tragic Death of Corporate Man
a hero for capitalism;
champion of the working class
by Tom Landaluce
Office of the Pyramid.
“What the hell is this?” said Franklin Buck gesturing to a pool of water where the elevator should have been. Nothing about the elevator shaft seemed quite right now that he looked at it closely. It was too well lit and gleaming white. Small circular lights squatted against the sidewalls and dashed an intermittent line all the way up the shaft and down below the water’s surface. The water was a questionable glowing blue and smelled like lemons with only the faintest trace of chlorine.
“Looks like water,” said Business Woman.
“I can see that,” said Franklin Buck.
“There’s a cabinet full of inflatable inner tubes out here in the hall,” said Senior Executive as he joined them in the peculiar shaft.
“So… what? We’re supposed to relax? Take a cigarette break? Go for a dip?” Franklin Buck said, his hand gestures becoming a little more pronounced.
“Don’t know about you, but I could use a soak,” said Business Woman.
“Are you serious?”
She said nothing and walked out into the hall to fetch an inner tube. When she returned she pressed a button on the side of the device, and it self inflated. She tossed it into the water, jumped in, and then pulled herself up onto it and floated. A large grin spread across her face and a dark red stain spread across the water.
“This is crazy,” said Franklin Buck.
“Ah. See now that there is what I missed you Franklin. You were the voice of… well not reason, but whatever. I don’t care why this pool is here, but here it is and I got blood, and who knows what else, all over me and I’d just as soon have it washed off since a good deal of it belonged to a colleague of mine.”
Franklin Buck bit his lip and looked down. Then he walked out of the elevator room, retrieved an inner tube from the conveniently placed cabinet, and joined Business Woman in the pool.
Corporate Man, Senior Executive, and a wobbly Commander Credit did the same.
They floated in the blood darkened pool, each pretending not to notice the fabric scraps and fleshy bits that sank slowly and disappeared into the depths. A gentle tone sounded and a pleasant robotic voice said, “Contaminants detected. Please pardon the audio inconvenience as the water is refreshed.”
A low whir, apparently the extent of the audio inconvenience, preceded a slight agitation in the pool. After a minute or so the water was a sparkling blue once more.
“So, Franklin,” said Business Woman. “Where the hell did you go anyway?”
Franklin Buck rolled his eyes and said, “Down.”
“Down? Would you care to elaborate?”
“Maybe this is an elevator after all. Push it,” said
Franklin Buck pressed the button. There was a hissing thunk as the elevator doors closed and a stampede of bubbles floated up from the depths. Then the water level began to rise.