Corporate Man is called in to investigate reports of vile, unethical business practices at Great American Business Company. What he finds there just might destroy him (except we all know the ending to The Tragic Death of Corporate Man so it should be fairly obvious that it can't really destroy him, though it can come close).
Enslaved by the Bonus Whores is an all new Corporate Man Adventure Serial. Chapters will post every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
“Georgie we can’t lose sight of the prize,” Ronald Regan said. He wore a powder blue sweater-vest over a bright-yellow collared shirt with a hot-pink neck tie. He had no pants on. His briefs were white. And a little snug.
“I know, I know. Trickle down. Let it trickle down,” George Bush said, wiggling his fingers and pantomiming rain. His tone and his gesture left no doubt in Ronald Regan’s mind that he was being mocked. He did not appreciate the tone, nor did he appreciate George Bush’s navy blue suit, though the zebra print tie was nice.
“It works,” Regan said.
“Yes it does. We trickle down just enough to keep them alive but leave them hungry so they’ll have something to focus their attention on.”
“Can you put some pants on?”
Ronald Regan shrugged and said, “Guess so.”
“Well, please do. Press ever got a shot of this they’d call us fags.”
“I’m sorry, but it’s difficult. There are so many options for color combinations these days. Do I go with pink to match the tie, yellow for the shirt, or maybe mix it up with some lime green?”
“Yes,” said George Bush.
“Doesn’t seem too safe?”
“White pants. White shoes. White belt. And hurry up.”
“Okay, okay,” Ronald Regan said. He pulled on a pair of gleaming white slacks.
“Finally,” Corporate Man called out, jumping down from above. “I hate fighting half naked men. The papers always skew the story when that happens.”
The two politicians nodded in agreement.
“Yes. I’ve seen the shots of you and FDR,” George Bush said, his hands held in front of him in a pseudo-karate style.
“That was a more innocent time,” said Corporate Man, adjusting his tie.
“How did you get in here anyway? There’s only one door and plenty of secret service. And where were you hiding?”
“I snuck in,” said Corporate Man, his tone slightly defensive.
“And where were you hiding?” George Bush asked again.
“Up there.” Corporate Man pointing in a vague, upward direction.
“But there are no rafters up there. No places to–”
Corporate Man punched George Bush in the face, turned toward Ronald Regan, and said, “So Ronnie, shall we do this the easy–”
But Ronald Regan was already upon him, also dropping down from a vague upward direction, calling out, “Trickle down! Trickle down!” and wiggling his fingers as he fell. Small bursts of light flashed at his finger tips, blinding Corporate Man with a glaring yellow radiance.