Corporate Man is called in to investigate reports of vile, unethical business practices at Great American Business Company. What he finds there just might destroy him (except we all know the ending to The Tragic Death of Corporate Man so it should be fairly obvious that it can't really destroy him, though it can come close).
Enslaved by the Bonus Whores is an all new Corporate Man Adventure Serial. Chapters will post every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.
Friday, March 1, 2013
When sliding down a waterslide one can affect the direction of one’s body enough to send it up the wall of the slide. This may be a nominal and futile effort in avoiding the ultimate destination of the descent but it is, in fact, true.
Also true in fact was the number of exits from the corkscrew tube that were in existence as it drops from the twenty-sixth floor.
That number would be two.
One such exit would deposit the unwary traveler on the ledge at the top of the ever-descending staircase leaving him or her at the entrance to the thirteenth floor. The other exit places the traveler in a much more… subterranean location.
A third relevant fact has to do with the corkscrew tube’s composition and pattern. At a point conveniently on level with the thirteenth floor the material of the tube changes from black PVC to white and levels from falling corkscrew to a relatively flat cruise. At this transition point there is a knob shape, something akin to a handhold on one of those indoor rock climbing gym, in the upper part of the side wall. In order to exit at the thirteenth floor one would need to reach out, snag the knob shape as they slid by thus shifting the momentum of their body up toward the ceiling of the tube. The inevitable downswing that follows would hurl them up the opposite wall and into a rounded hole-like opening.
If successful the thirteenth floor stair would be gained. If not, the traveler would encounter a sudden dip at the end of the relatively level area. They would then plunge down a nearly vertical freefall.
It was Franklin Buck’s misfortune and ignorance which caused him to sigh with relief when the corkscrew leveled off into welcome white and then glide right past the knob and the alternate exit and finally to his downward fate.